Friday, January 29, 2016

Things are not okay with Kay

Katelyn ( Kay ) and I had an argument last year. We started arguing about something related to how I treated our friendship. She mentioned something that lead to her saying all I talked to her about was other girls.

When she said that, I was hurt until I went back in our conversations and realized it was true. I did talk a lot about other girls. Not like James talk but about the failed attempts at a friend's/relationship stuff.

I was/am trying to get over Jasmine. Maybe it was how I was trying to not feel like a complete failure and Kay has always been my voice of reason. The grounded voice that told me what I needed to hear. She didn't let me get away with shit but she did it in a way that didn't make me want to smash things. She was my platonic soulmate ( we joked ).

And then/now, I needed guidance. More than just good advice.

And she was yelling at me for trying to move on from Jasmine and telling her about it. I got mad. I slammed in my desk and then tried to calm myself. I looked back and saw that I did talk about other things and I tried to talk to her do many times and she just ... never got back to me.

I told her that I tried to talk to her about other things. My blog ( which I have on my Facebook bio but no one notices luckily ) and my Second Chance Review page and video games and such. Especially Jasmine. I even pointed that I know about what is going on in her life and I comment and like her life events because since I can't be where she is ( she lives in Michigan ). She says she doesn't really even check other people's stuff on Facebook.

We went back and forth until she said she got it out if her system and she was okay. I didn't want to argue anymore and I didn't want to lose my ( platonic ) soulmate so I dropped it too.

Since then, I made a New Year Resolution based upon what we argued about ( worry less about other women and more about me ) and I made her more of an active part of SCR. she became my editor. She didn't like my writers though because she thought they ... were horrible writers.

And that was okay with me. She was so much better at writing than most people I knew. She had multiple fanfics with a big fan base so she had to be good at catching what I miss grammar wise and maybe help fix it towards the direction I wanted it to go.

But she, like, reviewed like two and I've had to kind of go over the rest in a mad dash before the 3pm deadline on Friday. Well either today or yesterday I mentioned that I needed a review and she was on top of it with a review of the Darkest of Days. I was so happy.

And with the new direction I want to take with SCR I wanted her to post it on the Facebook page and group of SCR and suddenly she had no time and she seemed annoyed.

I don't know what I do that asks people do much but if my ( platonic ) soulmate is asked with me ... maybe I'm doing life wrong